Classifieds
FOR SALE
1915 Harley-Davidson electric twin, three speed, good as new, fully equipped with best of everything, L$275, on terms. Phone NT-137.
STEREOTYPE matrices make the best and cheapest lining for poultry houses. They are 17×23 inches, stronger and more durable than tarred felt, and practically fireproof. L$1 a hundred at the Tattler office.
HELP WANTED
WANTED—Several hardy and observant individuals to undertake an important secret mission that definitely doesn’t involve kraken in any way. See Dr. Augustus Boffin at City Hall to apply.
THE NEW TOULOUSE TATTLER seeks talented reporters, photographers, and columnists. Phone Nikita Weymann, NT-668.
SITUATIONS WANTED
WOMAN new to New Toulouse seeks employment, hopes to afford a house someday. Call Victory Turwethiel Farspire at NT-345.
MISCELLANEOUS
LOVELY YOUNG SUFFRAGETTES are waiting for your call. Discuss politics and pantaloons for only L$5 per minute. Phone NT-355 now!
IF YOU DON’T FIND WHAT YOU WANT on this page, advertise for it. Don’t delay—run that little ad today. Phone NT-668.
DO YOU know in your heart that something isn’t right, but just can’t put your finger on it? Do you have gaps in your memory? Did you think you saw a flying squid by the river? We have the answers that they’re trying to keep from you. Only L$1 for a pamphlet that reveals all. BZ, NT-534.
THE DESTROY THE SUN Party stands for free sunglasses for all, the development of personal jetpack technology, the destruction of the sun and the addition of a moon, and gelato. NT-555.
NOTICES
SCHOOL of Divine Science and Phrenology open for enrollment. Phone NT-119.
DOCTOR AVALON would like to remind all of the Toga Party on the 30th. This time, per request of Soto Hax, Dj Erica Fairywren’s mix will be based on “the 90’s”, Our sources tell us this might involve flannel clothes for some reason (who are we Seattle?) but of course Togas are welcome as usual. At the cup and harp dining room.
ALL PERSONS having bills against the parish are hereby respectfully requested to present same to the Police Jury on Wednesday preceding the regular monthly meeting, otherwise these bills will not be paid until the following meeting of the Police Jury. H. Bodin, Secretary.
Classified ads are posted every Monday and are L$1 per word. No advertisement taken for less than L$25. Contact NT-668 to place an ad.