Classifieds

On By Nikita Weymann

FOR SALE

PLOT FOR SALE—St. Louis Cemetery #23, slightly used tomb included or BYOT. Certified unhaunted by actual priest (part-time). Excellent source of goofer dust. Serious offers only to Lazaire Bienvenu, Agent, NT-333.

FOR RENT

RECENTLY FUMIGATED storefront for rent, steps from streetcar line and Laveau Square. Possible light spectral activity but a steal for the right sort of business. Lazaire Bienvenu, Agent, NT-333.

HELP WANTED

THE NEW TOULOUSE TATTLER seeks talented reporters, photographers, and columnists. Phone Nikita Weymann, NT-668.

NOTICES

SANITARY NOTICE. The throwing of dead animals and other refuse in the streets and ditches of New Toulouse is prohibited, and persons guilty of doing so will be fined. All householders are urged to help keep the town in a healthful condition by keeping their premises clean and free from rubbish of all descriptions. H. GODENOT, Mayor.

JOIN the Citizens’ League and help elect a new city government that will work FOR THE PEOPLE. Promotional materials now available at our headquarters, 26 Basin Street, New Toulouse.

SUPPORT MAYOR GODENOT in his bid for reelection—stop by and pick up some free posters. Alliance Party campaign headquarters, 1 Rue du Rossignol, New Toulouse.

MISCELLANEOUS

LOVELY YOUNG SUFFRAGETTES are waiting for your call. Discuss politics and pantaloons for only L$5 per minute. Phone NT-355 now!

DR. ZIP’S Radium Throat Lozenges will soothe and leave you with a glowing, vibrant voice.

PERSONAL

MARRY IF LONELY—For results, try me. Many wealthy wishing early marriage; very successful, confidential; strictly reliable; years of experience; descriptions free. The Successful club, Mrs. Purdue, Box 550, Oakland, Cal.

LOST & FOUND

NEW TOULOUSE STREET RAILWAY COMPANY. Persons having lost some article would do well to call up the office of the New Toulouse Street Railway Company to ascertain whether they left it in the streetcars. Many articles each day are turned in and the company is anxious to restore them to the rightful owner. Call NT-795.

Classified ads are posted every Monday and are L$1 per word; fee waived for sufficiently amusing advertisements. Contact NT-668 to place an ad.